It will soon be three months since my husband died and I have to tell you, it's still hard. Actually it sought of feels like somehow it got harder. Not sure why. Maybe it's becoming more crystal clear that he's gone. I feel sometimes that I'm just going with the motions - just doing.... It's hard to explain but I sometimes feel like I'm just going and going - like the Energizer bunny but I don't know where I'm going. I don't know if that makes any sense at all. I guess part of the struggle is because for 22 years I've been a wife and Frank and I had certain goals and plans together and now no Frank. Don't get me wrong, I have my daughter and I love her to death and I do and do for her but it's starting to hit me that I need to look at my life and start to see things differently, plan differently and so forth. I'm really having a hard time explaining this but my life today is not the same as it was 3 months ago and as I start to accept that it's a difficult and painful thing. I guess right now the only things that give me focus in my life is my daughter and my Lord. I'm reminded to not lean on my own understandings but to trust in Him and He will direct my path. Well I'm sure He already has that path set forth, cleared up, and ready for me so just pray that I can be still and "let God".
In this difficult time it has just made things easier to have such good friends as I have. The love and care my friends have shown me has just been incredible. I could not do any of this without my friends and the Lord sent you all to me for such a time as this.
0 Comments
Leave a Reply. |
AuthorI'm Dee, wife of the late Frank Nunez. I'm a woman of God who's depending on God to pull us through this loss. Archives
April 2016
Categories |